As I write this, I have a horrible, horrible headache but I know that lying down or just wrapping myself in a blanket to fall asleep is not an option. I’m after all the working mom. My choice, of course. I still have a hundred different things to take care of before I can even think of lying down. I guess it’s not that different for most moms- working, homemakers or working from home – because let’s face it all moms are working moms just their areas differ. No offence to dads, of course, but we do more work than you, most of it unpaid and that’s a fact. Yes, because somehow being a mom means juggling like a pro with no option to quit.
So, with my body urging me to sleep the only way I can ignore it while waiting for another meeting is to write (you may read rant!). And today it’s going to be about all the problems faced by working moms, which is probably every mom with a little change here and there.
Being a mom means juggling like a pro with no option to quit.
16 Problems Faced by Working Moms
Systemic apathy. One of the biggest problems faced by working moms is that policies of inclusion by employers are just restricted to pdfs. In fact, I’ll go so far as to say that no matter how hard you work, the policies are such that they will make you question your decision to continue working after motherhood at every few days.
Shallow Mindsets. The moment one identifies herself as a mom in a workplace, as someone who comes early and leaves on time to balance home and work, she is tagged as a dispensable commodity. This might make you think about the recent video of an IT employee who is mocked for leaving early. Well, it’s as authentic as it gets.
The moment you ask for hikes or promotions they will start talking about your average hours or that you leave early even if you do all your work in much less time. You just cannot win. Well, most times you cannot win.
Being a working mom, in most cases means that you will be working a second job out of the house apart from taking care of all the things that a woman normally takes care of at home. Yes, you are basically working two jobs and being paid for just one. And not too well either.
You miss out on a number of things because there are only 24 hours in a day and there is only so much you can do.
You probably have a working lunch to make up for the tight schedule that you are always trying to adhere to.
You hardly ever have the luxury to leave work without having to immediately start with your second set of responsibilities. Let’s just say going home to just have your dinner and play with your kid is out of the question if you do not have in-laws or parents stepping in for you. And since I firmly believe not to bog down my parents with taking care of my child at this age, I get bogged down myself. No matter how many helps you hire, it’s you who’ll be taking and juggling every single thing.
You also probably have to restart your careers from scratch post your maternity break or your pre-motherhood experience will be made more or less irrelevant because apparently being a mother dumbs you down. Yes, why else would employers think so?
Every day is a battle to stay relevant and not get overlooked.
Your mornings will start before everyone else and your nights will end after everyone else.
You are paid much less than a man with the same experience.
There will not always be a daycare that will fit your needs.
But a good daycare will be your lifesaver.
You’ll always be in two minds about leaving your kid at a daycare to pursue your career. The guilt will always stay irrespective of all rationale.
You’ll be judged by fellow moms for apparently ‘choosing career over your kid’. This is the most unfortunate of it all.
You’ll always have a shortage of leaves because most of your leaves will be for your kids. You’ll probably end up dragging yourself to work when you are sick.
16 Problems Faced By Working Moms. Read here. #WorkingMoms Click To Tweet
Well, for now, I think these will do. The fact is being a mom and holding on to your career is extremely tough. So many women bow out of the race because how much can an individual fight against? This is not a fight which can be fought alone. There are days when I feel disgusted thinking about the conversations I have to have with people trying to prove my worth. Or, when any discussion about my progress veers towards how accommodating they are being by letting me leave ‘early’ or manage ‘being a mom’ while working. That’s why I say, it ain’t easy.
This society is made up in such a way so as to stifle every woman out of the workforce or to make them irrelevant. And I don’t say it lightly, Every day is a fight. And I don’t know how long I can go on.
Question is, how long can I fight this fight? Question is, is there any use of fighting at all because this clearly isn’t something I can change even for myself? Is it even worth it? Question is, what are you doing to support women so that every day at work for them is not a fight to stay relevant and be valued? This #FeministMonday, think about these.
This post is part of the #FeministMondays series (previously called #IAmAFeminist series) on the blog. Inspired by a TEDx talk by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie – We Should All Be Feminists, I intend to talk about the need for feminism through my posts, posts on my experience and observation as a female. I intend to talk about issues concerning women.
Join me and let’s work towards a world of gender parity. Remember, each voice counts. Tell me your story.